folk music and rejection (part 1)

I went to a folk music open mic Thursday night to see a friend from college play (Dan). I thought he has gotten much better! His voice has matured and his guitar playing is very solid now. I enjoyed listening to him play a lot! While listening to Dan play, I finally understood the perspective, “there shouldn’t be Christian music, just Christians playing music.” Now, I have been tremendously blessed by “Christian” music and I think it is very edifying to other Christians. It struck me how easy it is to be a Christian and play music for other Christians. How difficult it is to be a Christian and be a redeeming influence on the culture and on music by playing “in the world.” As I was listening to the lyrics of Dan’s songs, I couldn’t help but realize how good he is as a songwriter. His songs were deep and meaningful and redeeming. He has found a way to glorify God through his play, his words and his actions up on the stage. All the while, being subtle enough that when people come and listen to him, they’re not offended by his lyrics.

Rejection
Guys: Another thing I realized that night was how I miss “the guys.” I wish I would have been included more by them my freshman year of college so that I could develop deeper friendships with them. As they matured, they got nicerJ Especially Dan. I was always the odd one out. When I got invited places it was often out of pity. And no, I didn’t have some poor view of myself that made me delusional into thinking that way. That was not always the case, but it often was. I was a little sheltered coming into college, so I can understand a little of why I would have been a tad bit more annoying to be around. My point in this is not to bash them, but to point out my desire to have guy friends. None of them are or were bad guys. Anyway, when the next year came by, I made new friends. I do not wish to replace the friends I have made as a result of this decision at all, but the friendships I got that year resulted in like 8 female friendships, and one guy friendship. I am close to most of those friends still now. However, almost all of them live away from me and/or are married. I don’t have a best friend. It makes me lonely. I wish I would have the opportunity to spend time with guys and be included in a “band of brothers” in a sense. One of my favorite memories in college was when they “let me” come with them to the Saco river in Maine for a kayak/canoe trip. We went up and down the river staying overnight at the sand inlets on the river. There was something special in that. Something I miss and long after. And something that I fear I will never get it.